Flash Mob
by Warrior Nun
Summary: (Set in the Flash Forward arc) It started out like another ordinary day...at least that is what Torbin Zixx, the greatest thief in the universe, first thought until he come across something...well...off.


Flash Mob

Torbin Zixx/Donnie

I'm just a casual viewer of the series, but I do know the story a bit. And also a certain friend of mine got me into this pairing, so please enjoy!

Warning(s): May contain BL/Slash, crazy hijinks, strong language, pop culture references, and things of that nature

I do not own either Bad Romance or Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, they are respectively owned by Lady Gaga and Nickelodeon (I think...)

* * *

Being a thief has its perks in life...

Unbound by rules, get the chance to travel around the world and beyond, make intricate heists and top it off with a grand exit.

Not to mention being a heart-breaker isn't bad either.

But there were times that even someone as awesome as Torbin Zixx needed some time to just slow down and relax. Mostly in civilian attire that would make him looked like anybody else but still look good. And maybe have a nice cup of toffee nut mocha at a cafe. Like he was doing right now, people watching as he takes occasional sips.

Zixx couldn't help but smirk at whenever he see a girl, and occasionally a guy or two, swoon over him while their lovers watched him with murderous glares. He even threw them a bone now and again by showing off his tongue as he took a sip. The mercenary couldn't help with the fact that he was born with a certain privileged appearance that people couldn't help but stare. He was just that handsome, even in civvies.

Of course all these little boys and girls meant nothing to him. There was only one person that was the apple of his eye…or rather the flower of his eye.

Pretty in Purple Donatello, aka Donnie…or Lilac as he liked to call him.

Zixx would try to sneak him away for a date or even a romantic getaway but his disapproving brothers, two elder and the youngest, always stood in the way, Raphael particularly. But Zixx didn't get to where he was by giving up at hard challenges. He knew that eventually he'd get his chance. Patience is a virtue that he had taken close to heart.

Just then as the mercenary absentmindedly looked out the glass of the café, his green eyes widened when he saw a familiar pretty ribbon flow in the wind as he saw a certain pair of long, ravishing olive green legs walk. And lo and behold, it was Donnie, and his brothers were with him but that didn't mean anything. All that matters is being with his Lilac. With a confident grin, Zixx quickly ordered a French Vanilla and dark chocolate mocha with extra cream, which he knew was his Lilac's favorite, and went outside to greet him.

Of course he didn't count on how fast they are moving (kinda ironic when he briefly remembers his favorite Aesop tale about a race between a turtle and a rabbit)...or with their training in ninjutsu, they could be rather evasive.

But when he had an eye on a prize, Zixx would never leave it out of his sight.

Just like his Lilac.

When they finally reached to the Grand Central Station, Zixx was sure that he was at a good distance for him to call out, even if it might risk him having a punch in the face by a certain hot-tempered red masked turtle.

"Hey..."

But he was cut off by the first lyrics of a certain song from the days of old.

_c/ Ooooooooo_

_Caught in a bad romance…_

_Oooooooooo_

_Caught in a bad romance… c/_

"What the…" was the first two things that come out of the thief's mouth as he tried to look for the source. Where is that coming from?! That is when he noticed that some of the people were wearing overcoats (how does he miss that?)

One of the members in the group of seven played the instrumental version of the old pop song and removed their overcoats to reveal their unique (for a better lack of word) costumes and started performing. Wait…is one of them wearing a bondage suit?!

_c/ Rah rah Ahhh! _

_Roma-roma-mamaa!_

_Ga-ga-ooh la la!_

_Want your bad romance! c/_

Soon everyone started to gather around and watch the performance and this included the Turtles who all went up front. This proved to be hard for Zixx when he tried to reach Donnie and even when he called out the smart turtle couldn't seem to hear him but he made sure to keep the mocha he got him intact.

_c/ I want your ugly_

_I want your disease_

_I want your everything_

_As long as it's free_

_I want your love_

_(Love-love-love I want your love)_

"Watch it!" Torbin let out a growl as he went ignored when he was almost bumped by another interested pedestrian. He was about to shout out for Lilac's attention one more time until the crowd started to sing along, most of them taken up clapping. Oh, that is just perfect!

_I want your drama_

_The touch of your hand_

_I want your leather-studded kiss in the sand_

_I want your love_

_Love-love-love_

_I want your love_

_(Love-love-love I want your love)_

_You know that I want you_

_And you know that I need you_

_I want it bad, your bad romance c/_

Raphael however felt his "There's a Creep About" senses tingling and stayed close to his second baby brother. He had a feeling that someone might try to snatch him up. Little does he know that he is closer to the truth than he thought; though Donnie seemed to enjoy the choreography, even mentioned that they have Lady Gaga's moves spot on. So maybe it doesn't hurt to enjoy life's big lipped alligator moments once in a while. Just a smidge…

_c/ I want your love and_

_I want your revenge_

_You and me could write a bad romance_

_(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh!)_

_I want your love and_

_All your lovers' revenge_

_You and me could write a bad romance_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh!_

_Caught in a bad romance_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh!_

_Caught in a bad romance_

_Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah-ah!_

_Roma-roma-mamaa!_

_Ga-ga-ooh-la-la!_

_Want your bad romance c/_

But even with the hothead turtle on high alert there was no way he could prepare himself for one of the lead dancers grabbing Donnie by the wrist and started dancing a rather risque waltz with him.

When Torbin saw what happened as he craned his neck up, he was seething with anger.

_c/ I want your love and_

_I want your revenge_

_I want your love_

_I don't wanna be friends c/_

The said dancer that dared to touch his Lilac was probably around the same height as him thanks to his trained eyesight…somewhere around Lilac's age, maybe a bit older. His dirty blond hair was in a stylish messy fashion, something that little girls found attractive these days.

He certainly didn't like how close he was getting to Lilac, who seemed to be a bit uncomfortable. Just look at the way he was pulling away from him! He doesn't want the pretty boy!

_c/ Je veux ton amour_

_Et je veux ta revanche_

_J'veux ton amour_

_I don't wanna be friends_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!_

_I don't wanna be friends_

_(Caught in a bad romance) c/_

Torbin was at his limit when he had the GALL to sing the French section of that damned song!

BASTARD! No one serenades Lilac in French but HIM!

"Alright then, pretty boy…two can play at this game."Zixx thought and pushed his way through the crowd to get a better shot at his plan but made sure not to get in Raphael's line of vision.

_c/ I don't wanna be friends_

_(Caught in a bad romance)_

_I don't wanna be friends_

_Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!_

_Want your bad romance_

_(Caught in a bad romance)_

_Want your bad romance! c/_

With a plan already thought up he waited until the pretty boy dancer spin Donnie away then skillfully tossed the special mocha he got in the air and grabbed Raphael then spun him around towards the other dancer. The blond grabbed and dipped Raphael but was shocked that it wasn't the same turtle he was dancing with before. Both the red-masked turtle and the dancer looked to see Zixx take Donnie into his arms and dipped him then held out his hand to grab the mocha cup and the contents all landed in perfectly. The crowd clapped and cheered over Zixx, thinking it was all part of the show. He doesn't have the heart to correct them, but instead let them live that dream and graciously took a bow with a blinding white smile. Even Leonardo and Michael-Angelo couldn't help but clap along.

"He may be a creep but Zixx got some moves." The youngest commented, to which Leonardo couldn't help but agree. A pest or otherwise, that man sure knows how to wow the crowd in civvies. Soon the crowd slowly disbanded as they went their usual way and the dancers left, their leader followed but not before tossing Raphael on the floor before walking off in a huff; obviously pissed at the fact that Zixx cut in between him and Donnie. The hothead turtle growled in annoyance as he saw the familiar thief sweet talking his brother.

"Bonjour, Lilac, how have you been?" he flashed a devilish grin as he hold up the mocha cup, causing Donnie to blush and laugh softly while taking the beverage from him. Just when he was about to lean down to place a kiss, that is where Raphael drew the line.

"Oh THAT'S IT!" he ignored both protests from his brothers as he charges at the thief. He would rip the lips right off of his pretty face.

However, Zixx took note of the red-masked turtle's making a charge at him but smirked nonetheless. "Uh-oh gotta go…" then he bent down and place quick kiss on Donnie's lips. "Till we meet again, mon cher."

With that, he took off out of the subway station, with Raphael following in tow. It didn't took them long to be out on the streets, Zixx dodged the pedestrians left and right with ease with the particular masked turtle following close behind. He was gaining on him, but little did he know that Zixx have some tricks up his sleeve. After running a few blocks, the mercenary spied a window washer on one of the buildings. To another point of view, it was just your run-of-the-mill John that washes windows. However, this particular window washer took note of Zixx as he tips his hat up to see him better.

The dark-haired thief smirked as he gave the other man a two-finger salute. The said man smirked back as he tips his hard hat a bit, before Zixx ran underneath his hovering scaffhold. He timed the right moment as he inches his bucket filled with soapy water until the turtle man reaches to his scaffhold…

Bingo…

The window washer made it look like a casual accident by spilling some of the water before Raphael's feet, causing him to slip around before falling hard on his shelled back. He laid on his back for a minute in silence, followed by a growl of annoyance along with a frustrated roar that is enough to jump the people around him before part like the Red Seas in order to stay out of his rampage. Zixx glanced over his shoulder and smirked. He was anticipating this…but that is just the tip of the ice berg.

That was only meant to slow him down for phase two.

When he turned a corner, the thief spied a taco vendor up ahead. The owner has the appearance that can be found from H.P. Lovecraft's works, mostly the entity known as…Cut-throatloo? No, Cthulu…right…though from those that he had met so far, they're a rather pleasant bunch. Plus, they make really tasty tacos.

Anyway, time for phase two.

When the said owner looked up to him, Zixx smiled as he gave him the same two-finger salute to him. The octopus-faced alien got the message and nodded, quickly whipping out a small special and applied a generous amount of his secret hot sauce. And I do mean generous…

Just as the mercenary flew pass the taco vendor, Raphael found himself stopped by what looks like an alien with an octopus for a face, minus the suckers on the tentacles, of course. Oh, and he have what seemed like a mini burrito shoved into his mouth.

"Sample, sir?" he asked cheerfully, despite force-feeding him the said Mexican wrap in his mouth without his permission first.

The moment that he had the whole burrito in his mouth, Raphael felt his face heating up. He could feel each drop of sweat from his brow as tears stung the corners of his eyes. There was a stinging sensation all over the interior of his mouth, slowly slipping down his throat. There is one thing that he could only do.

"Eeee-ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRUGGGGGGH!"

The pigeons flew up in shock as the cry louder than thunder rang throughout the air, probably the entire city. While people were wondering what happened, Zixx was the only one who knew and he couldn't help but smile in victory.

"Music to my ears…" he drawled out.

He didn't care if people would stare at him strangely; he couldn't help but do a small waltz, twirling around a bit as soon as a cabbie coincidentally drove up to him. He slide through the door to the backseat and relaxed against the cushion, wearing a satisfied smile on his face.

"The central train station, Jeeves," he requested, crossing his legs.

The avian-like man glanced up to him in his rearview mirror and returned his smile. "Sure ting, Zee," he spoke up before setting the hover cabbie's engine overdrive and flew up to the highway. Time for some scenery route…no need to keep his dear Lilac waiting…

After all that Flash Mob incident, Leonardo decided to accompany his youngest brother to a nearby comic book shop while Raphael was currently outside taking practically all of the sodas from the soda machine. All they received from their red-mask wearing brother when he got back is a chant of "hothothothotHOT!" Donnie, on the other hand, would rather just sit at one of the café seats across the street to enjoy his drink and that book he bought from _Barnes and Noble_.

"Still wondering how Raph got into some of the mishaps while chasing Zixx," Leonardo thought to himself out loud as Michael-Angelo was busy checking out the comic books. "First he slipped underneath a window washer, and then lost him when he was stopped by a taco vendor guy…it couldn't be a coincidence right?"

The youngest turtle just shrugged, even though he's only half-paying attention. "Maybe…dude, it's only a Deadpool comic, and it cost THAT much?!"

"Hell yeah," the cash register girl, what seemed to be an odd hybrid of a rabbit and a snake. "Those comics, both Marvel and DC, are a classic, though no one seemed to be a fond of that one mini-series where Spider-Man sold his soul to the Devil…copies still in the bargains bin to this day. Boss was thinking about recycling or burning them sometime."

Michael-Angelo was impressed at this new information. "Even in this age, that comic is still hated."

The Rabbit-Snake Girl nodded. "Don't get me started on that two-shot where Catwoman is Gotham's hero…"

Leonardo sighed, knowing that whatever he would say would just flow into his brother's ear and out another. So he allowed him to have a small chat with the register girl, which he found out that her name is George thanks to his good eyesight. The eldest brother only shrugged and looked over the shop window, keeping an eye on his second younger brother. Donatello was enjoying himself, reading his book while savoring the mocha that was given to him by a certain thief. Right after dashing off in order to escape Raphael's wrath…

Leonardo blinked when a taxi hovers before Donatello, who looked up from his book. He could see a smile growing on his second-younger brother's face when a familiar man stepped out of the cab, with an elegant grace. Like he is from the upper class and the cab is his limousine. He watched as Zixx looked over to the cab driver with a smile, before flipping him what looks like a penny.

Which is odd that throughout his experience in this era, he doesn't remember seeing any coin money, most of the currency are practically digitized and both paper and coin money are either seen in museums or decorated on walls within frames. He couldn't see the cab driver's reaction, but judging by his interaction with Zixx, who smiled wider as he fist-bumped with the driver.

"Now what's going on over there?" he asked to himself.

"No way…" Jeeves smiled brightly as he held up the penny to get a better view. "The Union Shield design of 2010…I've been looking for this design forever! How did you get it?"

Zixx just casually shrugged, smiling his trademark smile. "Men of my trade are like magicians, we gotta have some secrets."

Jeeves seemed to get the message. "Yeah, whatever!" then he looked over to see Donnie who was watching curiously, before holding up his fist. "Have fun with your date!" Then he looked over to the purple-masked turtle and gave him a saucy wink. Donnie, in turn, blushed at the compliment as the avian alien drove off back to the highway above.

Zixx salutes after his friend before taking a seat in front of his beloved, prompting his chin on top of his palm.

"Hey, Lilac…enjoying the mocha?"

He flashed the smile which he dubbed as the "Smolder", something that will melt hearts of both ladies and gents. However, Donnie is not easily swayed. One of the things that he love about him, playing hard-to-get; with Zixx's choice of occupation and his sheer determination of not giving up, he is willing to chase him till the ends of the universe.

Donnie smiled at him, before bringing to the coffee cup to his lips.

"Sweet, actually," he replied, before taking a sip.

Zixx grinned widely at this, seemingly satisfied with the answer. "I'm glad," then he leaned in across the small table and place his lips upon Donnie's. He could taste the vanilla and dark chocolate upon the green lips; he smiled further when Donnie was about to part his lips a bit. This is even sweeter…

"ZIXX, YOU LITTLE BASTARD! GET OFFA HIM!"

Damn, so close!

Zixx pulled away –regrettably- to find a certain red-masked turtle, glaring straight at him with rage as he breathed heavily while in his tri-fingered hand held a crushed soda can, its contents were flowing out to the concrete sidewalk. Oh, he almost forgot about him.

"Oh, hey, Red Pepper, how are you?" he spoke casually. Then he turned to Donnie who was smiling in amusement. "Parting is sorrowful but it will be brief." He placed a quick kiss upon his lips before getting up and sprinting off down the block again, with Raphael following close behind.

"Come back here and face me, Zixx!" he roared, trying to keep up with the thief's speed.

Zixx grinned as after a few blocks, he was about to reach an alleyway, with a certain bum that was relaxing against the wall with a bottled water in hand. He smirked when the latter's eyes met his, as soon as he near his post, Zixx gave the old man a two-finger salute. The homeless man nodded before moving up just in time Raphael was about to approach. He timed his time right when he fell in front of the turtle's path, tripping him up and making him fall flat on his face.

The mercenary kept on running, even after relishing the frustrated cry of the hot-tempered turtle. It won't be long till he gets back up on his feet…till then, he'll be waiting.

Just another day for Torbin Zixx…mercenary, greatest thief of the universe, and all around lover of Lilac…

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